Message Replying To

From Lucy, Age 19

Ht. 5'6", Start: 208 lb, Today: 160 lb, Goal: 125 lb - Hey guys, I've been in a terrible funk for a couple months now. I seriously don't know what is wrong with me. I cannot stop eating, it feels like it's not even me doing it. I keep just eating everything and anything all the time and I have NO SELF CONTROL whatsoever. I am starting to seriously disgust myself. I have no idea how to stop it, I keep telling myself everyday "today will be the day, im gonna eat healthy and go for a run" and everyday ends the same, it's like im possessed. the thing that sucks the most is i know how great i would feel if i started being healthy and exercising daily but I still continue to make myself feel terrible and sick and miserable. I am so sick of dealing with weight issues, I feel like my whole life has revolved around my eating habits and disorders. I just want to live a normal life and think about other things besides my weight and food and exercise. i am in such an awful state of mind. For awhile I was losing weight, my lowest so far was 146 but now im back up to 160 possibly more because I have been eating so much and I havent weighed myself. I just want to go back to how I was when I lost all the weight before, but I dont even know how I did it then. I mean I know what I did to lose the weight..I just dont know what state my head was in to be able to do that and not cheat and to exercise all the time. I want this so bad. I just want to be happy. I'm sorry, these are just scattered thoughts I'm typing really fast... Im just so sad. any comments would be greatly appreciated. I just need to talk to someone :'(