Message Replying To

From Flower Fawn, Age 15

Ht. 5'5", Start: 184 lb, Today: 178 lb, Goal: 150 lb - Omg I'm so frustrated and I hate myself today. I've been 178-184 lbs, fluctuating back and forth, since DECEMBER! When I woke up I realized my scale didn't work (it's digital and the battery died) but it made me even more frustrated becuase I KNOW I didn't loose anything, I'm not loosing inches, not gaining any self esteem. I feel like I've "cracked." I look and feel terrible, I haven't felt this bad physically and mentally for such a long time. I feel fat and old too because I get backaches and headaches sometimes and I never used to before. But I can't stand this any more. Christmas is my favorite time of year, and have 6 months to go to get down to 170, my first mini-goal. Surely I can loose 8 freakin pounds in 6 freakin months?! I want to at least look nice! Everyone in my family has been sweet saying I look so thin when they know I've gained, but at this time last year I was close to 160 lbs and loosing and I'm so mad for gaining back all this weight, I can really tell and I promised myself I would never treat myself badly again but look where I am now!!! :( Sorry about the sop story...