Message Replying To

From Amanda, Age 14

Hello you may already know me.. Well i haven't joined weight watchers yet because my aunt (the one who was going to let me borrow 100$) Had to use that money for her son (my cousin) because it is his graduation .. so now i have to wait for my mom to get money (the 11th) and then she is going to enroll me in weight watchers.. BUT i dont think i can do it . I am very lazy and i hardly EVER lets say NEVER go outside.. (i am homeschooled) I dont want to waste my mom's money and join WW and then fail and not lose nothing! I feel like a LOSER.. My dream is to be a Ballerina and to get into Gymnastics but i think that would never come true... I weight 250 pounds and i am 5'3 . It is realy hard to say " TODAY I AM GOING TO END MY TORMENT AND LOSE WEIGHT!" And i have alot of problems.. I am depressed (i take pills) And my mom is Single and i am an ONLY child ... No one to support me.. No one to be my friend.. The only SO CALLED friend i have is 2 years younger than me and she only comes to play SIMS and then leaves.. I am embarrased to go outside because MY BIG UGLY FAT BUTT is always on the way. And my BIG FAT BLUBBER BELLY! size 49! My feet always hurt because of my weight i am 100 pounds overweight! CAN YOU IMAGINE! walking around with 100 pounds? I am always tired i sleep alot too.. I dont do nothing but EAT , USE THE NET , TAKE MY CLASS , SLEEP , AND WATCH TV... Thats my life a borring heck of a life.. If only losing weight was as easy as eating.. But the problem is not WHAT i eat its how i EAT it i eat so fast.. And i NEVER exercise... One day i exersized for 1 hour and said i am going to do this everyday! But the next day my legs hurted so much i gave up and forgoted about it.. I wish i had a rich family it would be much easier.. I know i what u thinking.. You saying " GET UP THE DAMN COUCH AND EXERSIXE! " you think its easy? no! its hard! we fat people cant even run or walk 1 mile (atleast i can't) i get tired and start to cry and my mom then say "Ok lets take a taxi" I wish i wasn't like this! This isn't the real me! The real me is a beautiful girl full of spirit and happines , Very atheletic and Adventuress. But .... Its just to hard! i wish i could just die and be born again and start life again! why is the world so cruel to me? WHY! *sniff* If any of you feel like this and want to be my buddy go ahead and email me at oceananie@yahoo.com **GOD BLESS** ~Amanda~