Message Replying To

From Ishie, Age 15

Does anyone ever feel reckless around food? Like, i'll describe the feeling. I do very well in dieting until midday when i see food i really want. i take a bite. another bite. i stop, and when everyone leaves the room, i cant stop looking at the food. i can like hear my heart beating, not any faster or louder, i just notice it more. i feel like i have the shivers, i stuff my face with the food, it only makes it worse. i keep stuffing, gorging all i can in my mouth, when i realize i just ruined my diet. i eat more, and i give up exercising for the day, because i know i've already ruined my diet. i feel like bursting out crying and i dont feel in the mood to do anything about it. the thought of getting together with friends just makes me feel fatter, grosser, guiltier. I hermit from friends and family for the rest of the day, eating more, crying more, feeling like im going to burst, but i cant stop, i wont stop, something inside me wont let me stop, i lock myself in my room, i fall asleep, and then i get in trouble for everything that i obviously ate, not only with my mom, but with myself and my weight. i think im psychotic. if i'm not, reply, if i am, reply, but really if i am i can deal with it myself. really, just... HELP!