~ OBESITY IS KILLING ME.. ~

Ever since i can remember, ive had weight problems. Right now i am very obese, around 280 lbs., i have high blood pressure and am at risk for diabetes. My life is a living hell...at night ill lay in bed and wonder why am i this way? Why cant i have a perfect body and have an amazing boyfriend? Truth is...i have never had a boyfriend, most of my friends are fake, and my family is embarassed of me. I have no siblings and my cousins are all popular and but dont barely ever talk to me, especially at school. My biggest fear in life is going to the doctor, because i know i am going to get a very long talk about why i havent done anything or tried. For the last time, i try and i try, everyday of my life. I feel like im just a disapointment to people especially my family and friends. In school im so scared i dont even take my jacket off cause im scared people will see how fat i am and laugh....
This is the worst thing that could ever happen in my life, and i dont think it will be going away anytime soon..