Hello. I have a 13 and 9 year old also. My 13 year old is average weight and eats worse than my 10 year old who has the weight problem. Amanda weighed 185 pounds and stands almost 5'4". She played 3 sports, rarely stayed in and ate fairly healthy. Recently she has lost 2 pant sizes and 13 pounds. What I found was PORTION control. It took getting use to but has worked well. It cost a little more and takes a little more time but it is worth it. I buy single servings of chips.If we buy big bags i count out 15 to a baggie as soon as we get home. This stops her from overeating chips.I buy individual serving of sherberts ( this is etter than ice cream). I do not deprive her just gained portion control. We stopped eating out as much, and started eating more fruits. I buy diet cokes or no cokes at all. It is working and she is amazed by her weight loss. Her bathing suit I bought just 2 weeks ago is getting lose and looks like she will need a new one soon. I do do not know if any of this will help or not but I hope so.Have you tried seeing a dietician ( to help put a plan in action)? That is were we learned all of our new eating habits. Hope you get the help you need. May God bless you.