From Motivated, Age 19 - 06/09/08 - IP#: 71.192.26.xxx Click here to reply Ht. 5'7", Start: 215 lb, Today: 205 lb, Goal: 150 lb - okay- so i've lost like 10lbs so far. it took a long time to finally get the ball rolling. i found out i really can't lose weight without counting calories- so i did and it's working. i'm a compulsive over eater- but i think it's less emotional now and more of a physical habit, so it's been easier lately sticking to my calories because i can deal with the physical addiction to food, just physical cravings, not as much of a mental dependancy. but i'm having one of those days where i feel like a beached whale. i biked to work and back even in 95 degree weather and ate 1275 calories of mostly very health foods, a lot of fiber and protein of course (fiber helps weight loss A LOT). but- i keep touching my body or looking down at it and tearing up, because i just have sooo much fat all over. i'm so disgustingly squishy- i can just sink my hands into almost all parts of my body inches and inches of blubber. i can't stand it. i want it off NOW. and i've been pretty amazing on my diet and exersize and i've lost like 3-4lbs this week, but i fell like it's not enough even though i know rationally it's great. i hope my weight loss will be the same this week and i can get under 200 soon and STAY under 200 FOREVER. i'm just so angry and frustrated- and don't know why i hated myself so badly to put on all of this weight. because that's what it is when i binge- it's hating myself and essentially abusing myself. it is so damaging physically and mentally and i hate living with the consequences. i never want to binge ever ever ever again- and i really don't think i will (btw- this huge shift in doing so well in my diet was actually caused by a binge/purge a week or so ago- i DO NOT usually purge AT ALL. it was not normal for me- and i NEVER WILL AGAIN because i do not want to damage myself. but that night really showed me how damaging it was and horrible, and that i wanted to go about this the right way so it will be permanent this time. i even broke blood vessels in my face from forcing so hard and that really really scared me). i just wish i could change my past...i know i can change the future- but it feels like my goals are so far away...i'm really disinheartened today even though i should be happy with my loss...it's just not enough.
Reply from Claire, Age 19 - 06/09/08 - IP#: 64.131.205.xxx Hello there, inspiration!!---cause that's what you are. YOur 5 pound loss and motivation to lose this weight is amazing, trust me...a little bit goes a long way...soon you'll be losing 5 more and then 5 more after that. "don't know why i hated myself so badly to put on all of this weight. because that's what it is when i binge- it's hating myself and essentially abusing myself. it is so damaging physically and mentally and i hate living with the consequences. "-----yes, same with mee! I binged because of depression and boredom. I wasn't even hungry when I was stuffing my face late at night with ice cream and who knows what. I know 5 lbs must feel like nothing but believe me...it's SOMETHING and this is just the beginning, you will be losing so much more--just keep going as you're going work hard, and don'tt critisize yourself. I have a flabby, squishy stomach and such too and I HATE it, I actually yell at my stomach sometimes (lol) it's just a spare tire that I really don't need and it's so frustrating but turn your anger and frustration towards yourself into motivation to push yourself harder and lose weight and maintain a healthy lifestyle. This is not easy. You didn't gain all that weight in a day..therefore it won't take a day to lose it. It'll take time but trust me, it'll be worth it. I remember when I weighed 210 and I lost those first 5...I was the happiest girl alive! and from that I started losing so much. The weight will melt off..it always does in the beginning. However for me now, the process has slowed down maybe cause I'm not as far from my goal weight. YOU ARE A MOTIVATION, AN INSPIRATION AND DON'T EVER, EVER GIVE UP---I trust you won't. Just KEEP ON GOING! and don't let your past rule over you..the future will be as bright as you want it to be, just depends on how much light you carry on forward to make it shine. Tc, and good luck! =)
Reply from Jessica, Age 22 - 06/09/08 - IP#: 12.149.100.xxx I totally know how you feel. I am absolutely obsessed with the scale. I'm trying to get better about it. I look to the future. I tell myself realistically it will take about a year to a year and a half for me to get where I want to be the healthy way. It seems like a long way away. Think of it this way... a year is going to pass no matter what. So you can either do nothing and stay the same or take small steps and change your life. Time will pass by... it always does. Think about a year ago today...didn't it go by fast. Before you know it you will be looking back going wow look how much I've changed and look how much I've accomplished. I feel for you... because I get the same way. I'm here for you if you need support. My myspace is www.myspace.com/jrm1985ohio if you want to add me. You can do it! I believe in you :)
