From John, Child's Age 14 - 01/30/07 - IP#: 71.146.115.xxx  Click here to reply  
Hi everybody. I am really concerned about my daughter Lilly. Until about 12 years old, she was so thin and gorgeous. My parents would absolutely shower her with complements. She did belly dancing and looked so good! Then, she got her first period and it all went downhill. I would notice that she would take second helpings at dinner and she was always in the kitchen snacking. I encouraged her, since she was skinny and food is good for growing children. It wasnt bad, either, stuff like nuts and yogurt (we dont keep real junk in the house). A year go or so, when she was thirteen, I took my whole family on a cruise, and I was really surprised when I saw my daughter in a swimsuit. Her once tight abs had been completely covered by a small belly that would hang a little over her bikini. Her chest also grew considerably and her legs were much bigger than before. My wife noticed too but we agreed it was normal for girls to gain weight during this time. During the cruise, I was even more shocked how much she ate. She would eat 4,5 or six plates of food in one meal. She gained some weight during the cruise for sure. When we would go to our cabin after dinner I could tell that she was trying desperately to button her jeans but her bloated belly would not let her. After the cruise, I had a talk with her about the importance of health and she looked like she understood. I showed her some pictures and she was herself surprised how much weight she had gain. She went from a sliom 83pounds to a chubby 124 for her 5'3-5;4 frame. I though it would all be ok. Things only got worse. She was eating all the time. She dropped out of her swim team because she was too big. When she would sie her belly would literally bulge out of her pants. She weighs now about 260 pounds. She cries a lot about her weight looking at the girl she once was. When she tries to wear "Sexy clothes" Her chest and belly are just to big. During dinner one evening, her shirt literraly ripped in two. Her belly was simply enormous. It looked so unhealthy. My son is very lean and he tries to get her active, but nothing works. I was shocked how fat she looked. I miss my thin girl that wanted to be a model. She still exercises a lot but its hard for her. My wife and I both work so we cant stop her from snacking. She always complains that she does not have a boyfriend. I want my daughter to be lean and fit and have a boyfriend. What should I do??
Reply from David, Child's Age 11 - 03/05/07  - IP#: 68.167.254.xxx
I feel that it may be destructive thinking telling you daughter that if she does not lose weight, she will never get a boy-friend. This is not true. A boy-friend that is right for her will take her for what she truly is inside instead of her for her looks. If she has an attractive personality her size will not matter when it comes to attracting a boy. There may be boys that are attracted to her because of her weight.
The weight however may be detrimental to her health. A separate issue from the boy-friend issue. On that matter I feel you would be wise to seek professional help as it appears that your daughter may have an eating disorder.

 
Reply from Matthew, Child's Age 2 - 02/27/07  - IP#: 71.132.238.xxx
I agree that was some good advice she still is a beautiful person im sure, and that just try to get her to her goals, and i am sure that she will get a boyfriend, it doesnt matter about looks just whats inside, if you need to talk wildernes44494@yahoo.com

 
Reply from Jay, Child's Age 15 - 02/05/07  - IP#: 68.59.171.xxx
Well, I hope you know that at 260 pounds, she can still wear sexy clothes, it's just you that thinks she wouldn't look sexy in them.

 
Reply from John, Child's Age 14 - 01/31/07  - IP#: 71.146.115.xxx
Thank you. I try to make her feel better and I will always love her whether shes 100 or 1000 pounds, I just know how sad she is inside and I want to help her.

 
Reply from Debbie, Child's Age 9 - 01/31/07  - IP#: 206.154.58.xxx
she should still be your girl even if she isn't thin, hopefully you aren't making her feel like she isn't. Make sure there are no bad snacks in the house, it should be a family effort to improve the eating and health of everyone, not just one person. That much of a weight gain in 2 years should be checked with a doctor, if you haven't already take her to the doctor, probably a GYN, she may have a hormal issue going on. 150+ weight gain in 2 years is very unhealthy. Hopefully she will come to understand that her weight does not define her as a person, she is still a beautiful girl regardless of her weight.